As a family we have so many changes nearing in these next several months and we're truly beginning a new chapter in our lives. Our wedding in October -once seemed so far away. But now only a mere four months away, we're feeling the weight from the pressures of our date and it's to-do list grow heavier and heavier on our shoulders. Michael is about to undergo the biggest career change his life has ever seen, and our income status is still up in the air a bit. I've made the decision to go back to school for a degree major change with an end goal of attaining a Masters in Psychology. We're considering purchasing a new home as our lease ends in August, and Ry starts at an amazing new school this upcoming year that I was able to snag him a place at a few months ago. It's about to go down!
It's such an exciting new time, but its also nerve-racking! Michael and I sat down a few weeks ago for a few drinks over dinner and discussed our upcoming life changes, and I explained to him just how nervous I was about all that was to come. I told him I was scared of failure, that life would pile on more than we could handle, or that something bad would happen. And that's when he reminded me of something- the jeans came early.
Several months ago Michael and I were headed up on one of our bi-annual trips Asheville. We were going to do some hiking and just lay low. This trip was meant to serve as a getaway from all the stress we'd been under at the time- and there'd been a lot of it. We were in the midst of a really negative custody battle, that seemed as if it would have no resolve. It was draining our financial and emotional resources quite quickly. Michael was forced to tackle a hard issue, that at the time had him genuinely concerned for his son's privacy. I was undergoing a really challenging bout of depression, and I just couldn't seem to get out of my 'funk.' We were still fighting tooth and nail to get Ry back on track in school, after a series of circumstances left him falling behind in the beginning of the school year. And we'd become aware at the time, that we'd become the subject of some pretty off-base libel and slander. Needless to say, we NEEDED this trip.
We were struggling so much with the reality of our circumstance, and the things we couldn't change. We tried in every circumstance to do the right thing and work as hard as we could to resolve issues the right way. We did everything in our power to maintain our focus on Ry and his well-being, make our family's needs top priority, and just let go of everything else. But it felt like no matter how hard we tried to rise above, we still kept getting served shit sandwiches.
I'd ordered a few pairs of jeans online from Levi beforehand, hoping they'd arrive before we left, so I could wear them on our trip. But as it turned out, there were some serious snow storms in the Northeast. I received a notification four days before we left, that my package was delayed and scheduled to arrive the day after we departed. Now I get it, this totally shouldn't have been a big deal- but everything was just piling up and I was frustrated.
Despite my disappointment, I chalked it up as a minor inconvenience and left it at that. Then the next day, they arrived at my door. And this is going to sound like the silliest thing, but dammit it felt like a sign. I mean really, when does the U.S. Postal Service ever deliver something EARLY? I dread every time I order a package that's to be delivered by them because it almost never comes on time. And I ran to Michael, and I said,"You know what, everything's going to be okay- because the jeans, they came early!" We laughed together and it's become a frequent saying in our home now.
And it might seem funny, to think that a package delivery could serve as some kind of cosmic sign, but that's exactly what it was to me. It was positive Karma coming back round in our favor. All of our attempts to do the right thing, be good people, and keep our intentions pure- they came back round with positive results, and not just in the form of jeans. That custody battle? We resolved it calmly amongst ourselves before (what could have been the messiest portion) of trial had to be endured. We got the outcome we were hoping for all along, and most importantly developed a steady routine that really work's with Ry's best interest in mind. Our trip ended up being just the break my mind needed to get out of my 'funk.' And wouldn't you know it, Ry finished off the school year with some of the top test scores in his class- triple what they'd been closer to the beginning of the year. We were able to take a step back and realize that the libel and slander that had been circulating about us, was nothing more than someone else showing they were insecure, so we stopped caring about it.
The jeans came early. They came early in so many ways, and I'd kind of forgotten about that. Michael's reminder reassured me that as long as we continue to do the right thing, be good parents and positive role models, and put out good energy into the world- they'll keep coming early.
So that's exactly what we'll do during this next chapter.